Family therapy looks at the family as a whole. Instead of asking "What is wrong with this person?", we ask "What is happening between us, and what does each of us need?"
A family may come because everyone sees a need. Or one member may have been in individual therapy and realized that healing will be easier if the problems are talked through with the people closest to them. Either way, the aim is the same: more understanding, less blame, and new ways of living together that work better for everyone.
Families come for help with
- Ongoing conflict between parents and teenage or adult children
- A family member's addiction, and the strain it puts on everyone
- Separation, divorce and co-parenting
- Blended families and new step-relationships
- Caring for an aging or ill parent, and disagreements between siblings
- Grief after the loss of a family member
- Big changes: moving, a new country, a new baby, job loss
- Communication that has broken down, or silences that have lasted years
How family therapy works
We start by agreeing who will take part. Sometimes that is the whole household; sometimes a parent and an adult child, or a group of siblings. Not every session needs everyone: some may be with part of the family, if that helps the work move forward.
In sessions, each person gets the chance to be heard without being interrupted or attacked. I help the family notice the patterns that keep repeating, the roles people have fallen into, and the needs underneath the arguments. Then we practice doing things differently, at home and in the session.
Family therapy online
Online sessions make it much easier to bring a family together. Relatives can join the same Zoom call from different homes, even different cities, as long as everyone is in Florida, Colorado or Arizona at the time. Teenagers can take part with a parent's consent.
A family systems view
As a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, I was trained to see a family as a system, where a change in one person affects everyone else. That's why family therapy can help even when only one person seems to have the problem: when the family changes around them, change becomes easier for them too.